I Was Once a Fan of Pop Singer

Like many other young people， I love popular music very much， and worship pop singers too. So I have ever followed the stars. [I was once a fantastic fantastic follower of stars. （狂热的追星族）]（1）

　　Some time ago， two famous singers came to my [our （2） city to make a sing show [give a performance] （3）。 To my joy they are [were] （4） just the singers I worshipped. So I went to watch their show with my classmates. But this still could not satisfy our curiosity （好奇心） yet. The following day we decided to see them face to face. So we came to the hotel where the singers stayed. For having a meet with them [To meet them] （5）， we waited in front of the hotel's gate from 15：00 to 20：00. But we still didn't see the singers come out. So we went on waiting……

　　At last the famous singers went out. It was 21：00 sharp. Because they were hurrying to the gym （体育馆）， we got nothing else but their signatures.

　　Later， I often thought of that thing. Waiting six hours， just got a signature， is it worthy [worthwhile] （6）？

　　As a matter of fact， these singers were just as common aswe.

　　Now I realize we were foolish of doing [it is foolish of us tohave done] （7） that thing. Worshipping famous singers might not be a bad thing， but being an unreasonable fan of singers is not good at all.

　　If you are following the stars， I think you'd better stop doing that. Remember：our first task is to study， don't you think so？

　　四川省绵阳市南山中学高三（4）班 胥明

　　评 语

　　文章在语言上虽有不少不足之处需加以修改，但它写到的“追星族”的情况却在现代中学生中有一定的典型性。文章用自己切身的体会告戒“追星族朋友们”不要盲目追星，而要把更多时间花在学习上。文章中某些语言上的不足之处点评修改如下：

　　（1）作者想用 have ever followed表示“曾经……”，但这种用法一般在定语从句中，如：This is the best film（that）I have ever seen.故改之。

　　（2）my口气太大，改为our较好。

　　（3）原句有中国式英语之嫌，故改之。

　　（4）作者可能想用are表示这些歌手现在依然是他的崇拜对象，但在回忆往事时，除非特殊需要，一般均用过去式较为自然。

　　（5）原句是中国式英语，可用不定式表示目的。

　　（6） worthy做表语时，后面常接“of +名词或不定式”。这里该用worthwhile.

　　（7）原句句型错误。