I Love You

I will forever remember my former classmate， Xiao Hui.

　　She is not very pretty， but she has bright eyes. I can always feel the warmth of her eyes whenever I am sad or alone. Once I failed in the math examination. I was so depressed that I felt as if the end of the world had been coming. It was Xiao Hui who encouraged me. She gave me a beautiful card on which she wrote “Cheer Up” . I can always remember what she said —— As Long as you try hard， I believe that you will succeed later.

　　I always felt peaceful when I was with Xiao Hui. I could always tell her my secrets. I know that I must have been naive sometimes， but she patiently listened to [listened to me patiently] （1） ， with a smile on her face. Quite often we did not talk anything. We just sat there and enjoyed the music that both of us liked. I am fortunate to have such a close friend.

　　However， things changed one day.

　　That was a warm afternoon. When we were having a walk in the campus [on （the） campus] （2） as usual， she suddenly put her arms around me and gave me a big hug. “You are my best friend，” she said. “I love you. But tomorrow I'll leave for Suzhou to live with my parents.” I was so surprised that I could hardly utter a word. Tears ran down my cheeks. I didn't want her to leave me.

　　After a while， she left me. I watched her back. I knew she was also weeping. Nobody had ever said “I love you” to me before —— nobody but Mum and Dad. I was greatly moved. I realized that the genuine friendship was the most precious feeling in the world.

　　When someone loves you truly， your heart will be filled with warmth and happiness.

　　南京外国语学校 雷莹

　　评 语

　　全文情真意切，很有感染力，特别是文章后半部分设计的突然转折，对引出主题起到了较好作用。文章中某些语言上的不足之处点评修改如下：

　　（1）patiently为方式状语，无需特别强调时，正常位置应在动词后面较为自然。

　　（2）campus前习惯用介词on，the也可省去。