A Trip to Beijing

After the final examinations， my mother took me to Beijing on Jan. 20. We went there by train. We got off at Beijing Railway Station and lived [stayed] （1） in my uncle's. In those days we went to the Ruins of Yuan Ming Yuan， the Temple of Heaven， the Zoo of Beijing， the Summer Palace， the Forbidden City （故宫） and the Memorial Hall of Chairman Mao.

　　Beijing is not only a city with a long history but also a very modernized one. She's our political and cultural centre. She has many places of historic interest and scenic beauty. We can see high buildings everywhere. Every year lots of Chinese and foreign friends come to visit [it] （2） .

　　When Mom and I reached Beijing， the first thing we saw was a clear sky. The sky in Beijing was really very blue. The air in Beijing was so fresh that it made me excited.

　　Now in Beijing， the traffic is very convenient. There're a lot of buses， taxis， little buses [minbuses]（3） ， trolleybuses and subways [there is a subway too] （4） . Every ten minutes there must be a bus coming to the stop where you are standing.

　　Beijing is very clean. When I saw a rubbish-bag in my uncle's house， I didn't know what it was for at first. So my uncle told me that each family in Beijing has such bags. They have been used since last year. People put rubbish in them and take them downstairs to a certain place when they are full. Then the street cleaners take them away.

　　Now， Beijing people are busy working at various constructional projects. I think when the projects are finished， Beijing will be more beautiful！

　　上海第三中学初二（4）班 张莹颖

　　评 语

　　作者是一个初二学生，运用学到的英语，将自己的北京之行写得富有感情。有观察，有议论。用词和句型也较为贴切。文章中某些语言上的不足之处点评修改如下：

　　（1）在uncle家中是短暂停留，用stay较好。

　　（2）这里 visit 作及物动词，加上宾语it为好。

　　（3）面包车为 minibus.

　　（4）subway 作为一种交通形式，与bus等具体交通工具并列欠妥，故另起一句。